It's true, after 23 weddings and over 20 years of marital bliss my bride and I have never had a fight!
We have disagreed on things for sure, but we have never raised our voices at each other. Some well meaning experts say this is not healthy and couples should learn to "fight fair".
I politely disagree. Let me ask you this, if you work for a large corporation, have you ever had a "fight" with the CEO of your company? Or have you ever had a "fight" with your pastor or priest, where you started yelling and even insulting him or her? I highly doubt it. Why? You simply respect him or her enough and or the position they hold.
Wait a minute Evan, are you saying that I don't respect my spouse if I raise my voice and fight with them? The simple truth is, YES. You may respect them but certainly not enough. I LOVE, CHERISH and RESPECT my bride so much, that we never fight, nor do we want to. We never let anything get to that point.
How is this possible you may be wondering. It all starts with a cherishing mindset, it's impossible to "fight" with someone while you are cherishing them. A-B-C Always Be Cherishing. It's a great mindset to be in. Because my bride and I choose to get remarried in a different state or country every year, we are either on a post honeymoon bliss or we are planning the next fun wedding adventure. Some roll their eyes and call this unrealistic, however this is reality for my bride and I. If you want your marriage to be a dream come true, with mind blowing sex multiple times a week, then let this truth sink in; In order for things to change, you must change, in order for things to get better, you must get better. Trying to solve your marriage challenges with the same mindset that caused them will only lead you to the same results you have now, a mediocre or crappy marriage. Is this what you really want? I doubt it or you wouldn't be reading this blog.
He is a simple tip that will get you on the road to cherishing your spouse more. Did you know a recent study from CU Boulder shows that the act of holding hands begins the process of what is called interpersonal synchronization. How you ever felt out of sync with your spouse, chances are you have not held hands in a while. When was last time the two of you just took a walk together and held hands? ( insert your excuse here why you are not willing to change and do this, don't worry any excuse will do) The simple truth is, prioritizing time to take a walk hand in hand is anything but simple, yet the results are so worth it! Guys just do it for the great sex that night. Depending on the state of your marriage it may take more than one walk to get the romance burning again, so you better get started now. Take Action! You will be so glad you did.